Here is my one post for this month~ I have gotten so bad about blogging! Life is pretty good, not too much to report. Well.....there are a few things.
My brother's wedding is next weekend! YAY! I can't believe my baby brother is finally getting married! It will be in San Diego. And I get to see 2 of my girlfriends that moved there! I am doing a reading in the wedding. I am wearing a red dress. Which is very uncharacteristic of me! I usually wear black dresses to everything! Cami is wearing a mint green frilly dress with matching shoes. I. DIE. OF. CUTENESS! Mint green is one of my favorite colors. Is that kind of odd that mint green is one of my favorite colors?! ;)
Valentine's day weekend was fun with my hubby. We had nice dinners and saw two movies. American Sniper and yes, we saw 50 Shades. No comments/scoldings from other women, please, about how that is degrading to women and I should have more respect for myself and I should not have seen that movie. Quite honestly (that is one of my husband's favorite sayings), we both liked American Sniper better! Lol! For reals. We weren't too impressed with 50 Shades. It was long and slow and did not live up to the hype. I only read the first book and half of the second book and I was not interested in reading any more of it. And I did not like the ending of the movie. I'm glad I saw the movie so I would know what everyone else was talking about, but I don't plan on seeing it again.
American Sniper, on the other hand, was amazing. At first I didn't want to see it, because I hate watching war movies. Life is hard enough as it is, I don't want to watch a movie about a sad and depressing topic. Dave really wanted to see it though. OK so I loved it, and want to see it again! And it helped that Brad.ley Coop.er was in it!
Today Cambria went to her very first Princess Party! She dressed up in a Frozen dress and had SO. MUCH. FUN! Jacob came with us too, and had a fun time too!
I am trying and learning to let the issues go with my BIL, SIL and niece. Which is not an easy thing. Dave talked to his brother who finally admitted my SIL refused to accept my daughter into the family- one of the reasons being she thought we were too flippant when our previous adoption match fell thru the year before in San Francisco. What the what?!?! Is that the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard? Anyone who knows me IRL or who read my old blog knows that was devastating to us and I cried my eyes out for a solid year and finally got over it when Cambria was born 17 months later. Anyways, I am now starting to laugh at the ridiculous and hurtful things she did and said instead of letting it upset me. She was the one with the problem, not me. And my BIL finally admitted that I never did anything wrong to make my SIL dislike me. There, he finally admitted it. The sad thing is that it didn't really make me happy to hear him admit these things....it made me sad all over again that this person who was "so-called family" (Lol my BIL hates it when I say "so-called family"!!) totally rejected my daughter for some idiotic reason and never liked me for no reason at all. I guess the take-away message is that sometimes people just don't like you and there's nothing you can do about it. But I told my hubby he should be upset with his brother for allowing his wife to reject his niece. It's his niece too, and he ignored her too for the most part.
Anyways, enough about them!
I put these pretzels in my 9 and 7 year old's lunches for school, and they were individually packaged for Valentine's day, and they had princesses on the package and my boys both scolded me and told me not to put them in their lunches anymore- that their friends made fun of them for bringing Princess pretzels to school! Wow!
Cambria is talking so much. She says the funniest things! She is a sweet and sassy 2-year-old! We are having so much fun at mommy and me dance class and mommy and me music classes.
Our 3 year old Golden Retriever (the one who had her leg amputated for osteosarcoma) has her last chemo treatment in 2 weeks. I hope it worked, and that the cancer hasn't spread to her body. So weird- the chemo actually makes her more hyper and hungry!
The boys all start baseball in a couple weeks. My life will be spent at the baseball field 5-6 days a week. (I secretly love it, though!) Dave is at the batting cages with the boys now practicing batting, and Cambria is napping- the Princess party wore her out! Then we will meet up for dinner, and do all the Sunday night prep stuff for the crazy week ahead. I am hosting BUN.CO at my house tomorrow night. Because I won't see my friends until June when baseball Little League season is over! (Unless their kids are on the same team as my kids.) Except for a few hiccups now and then, I love my life and the people in it. I just wish I had more time for sleep!
Sunday, February 22, 2015
Friday, January 30, 2015
Almost February?!
I haven't posted since Christmas day! It is February in 2 days, and I haven't posted a single thing for January (or for 2015)! What the what?! Life has gotten in the way of me sitting down and writing about what my family and I have been doing. We are on the cover of a local neighborhood magazine and there is a 2-page article about my family inside the magazine. We are in the Feb. (current) issue. My friend is the editor who asked if we would do the interview & photo shoot. Sure! We'd love to. :)
I am taking a photography class at the local community college. Everybody that knows me knows that I love to take pictures. I swear that after I post a whole bunch of pictures in a row on FB or IG, that people delete me! lol whatever! I post pics on my other FB acct. for Cambria's birth family to see her and be able to watch her grow up across the miles. Guess who was the first person to like the picture I posted of her tonight? Her birth father. That makes me happy- when she is old enough to understand, I can tell her this so she knows he cares about her and takes an interest in her.
My kiddos are doing well. School is going well for everyone. Cambria is talking up a storm and stringing more and more words together into longer and longer sentences. My baby girl is growing up too fast & right before my eyes!
My girlfriends had a birthday dinner celebration for me and my friend whose birthday is the day before mine. It was a great time. We had a combo birthday celebration last year too, and it was so fun.
We are in the depths of basketball season with my sons, which is great exercise! Baseball season (Little League) starts up again next month….then I will really drop off the face of the earth! lol
Well, I can always be found at a baseball field! ;)
So much to report and at the same time, not much to report. Some stuff that I should not share on here (respecting other's privacy). I did see that new Blackhat movie last night with some girlfriends…OMG the lead actor is a hottie!
My brother is getting married in a month! Finally! I can't wait and I'm secretly hoping for a baby cousin for my kids soon! By the end of 2015! Haha! I grew up with great cousins, and I'm sad for my kids that they don't have any cousins. Well, actually, that's not entirely true. Dave's niece is technically a cousin to my kids, but she has nothing to do with them and has never -not once-acknowledged that Cambria even exists. When I finally asked her why she refused to acknowledge my kids, she said she believed she did nothing wrong and that my asking her that was "insulting and unfair"! Geez if you are going to deliberately ignore someone, at least be grown up enough to admit it! She is engaged and needless to say, we won't be attending the wedding. I'm sure she will send us an invite just for the present- lol! We've only heard from her twice in the past two years, and they were both requests for money! Sad. I really do wish she would take more of an interest in her 4 cousins, but you can't force sometime to talk to your kids or pay attention to your kids if they don't want to. :( But I digress…..
Back to my brother's wedding…..it is in CA and the hotel looks so cute and the reception site looks very nice and the food choices sound amazing. :) Plus we will take the kids to a local amusement park when we have downtime. It should be a nice get-away.
Oh- my dog Sophie! My sweet tripod cancer patient. She had chemo number 2 on Monday. She has thrown up in the evening after chemo both times now, but after that she seems back to her normal spunky self. If she was down and sick for a while afterwards, I would stop putting her through chemo.
Gosh, my life seems so boring. Sometimes boring is good. Happy Valentine's Day everyone! May your day be filled with love and laughter. And chocolate! Lots of chocolate.
I am taking a photography class at the local community college. Everybody that knows me knows that I love to take pictures. I swear that after I post a whole bunch of pictures in a row on FB or IG, that people delete me! lol whatever! I post pics on my other FB acct. for Cambria's birth family to see her and be able to watch her grow up across the miles. Guess who was the first person to like the picture I posted of her tonight? Her birth father. That makes me happy- when she is old enough to understand, I can tell her this so she knows he cares about her and takes an interest in her.
My kiddos are doing well. School is going well for everyone. Cambria is talking up a storm and stringing more and more words together into longer and longer sentences. My baby girl is growing up too fast & right before my eyes!
My girlfriends had a birthday dinner celebration for me and my friend whose birthday is the day before mine. It was a great time. We had a combo birthday celebration last year too, and it was so fun.
We are in the depths of basketball season with my sons, which is great exercise! Baseball season (Little League) starts up again next month….then I will really drop off the face of the earth! lol
Well, I can always be found at a baseball field! ;)
So much to report and at the same time, not much to report. Some stuff that I should not share on here (respecting other's privacy). I did see that new Blackhat movie last night with some girlfriends…OMG the lead actor is a hottie!
My brother is getting married in a month! Finally! I can't wait and I'm secretly hoping for a baby cousin for my kids soon! By the end of 2015! Haha! I grew up with great cousins, and I'm sad for my kids that they don't have any cousins. Well, actually, that's not entirely true. Dave's niece is technically a cousin to my kids, but she has nothing to do with them and has never -not once-acknowledged that Cambria even exists. When I finally asked her why she refused to acknowledge my kids, she said she believed she did nothing wrong and that my asking her that was "insulting and unfair"! Geez if you are going to deliberately ignore someone, at least be grown up enough to admit it! She is engaged and needless to say, we won't be attending the wedding. I'm sure she will send us an invite just for the present- lol! We've only heard from her twice in the past two years, and they were both requests for money! Sad. I really do wish she would take more of an interest in her 4 cousins, but you can't force sometime to talk to your kids or pay attention to your kids if they don't want to. :( But I digress…..
Back to my brother's wedding…..it is in CA and the hotel looks so cute and the reception site looks very nice and the food choices sound amazing. :) Plus we will take the kids to a local amusement park when we have downtime. It should be a nice get-away.
Oh- my dog Sophie! My sweet tripod cancer patient. She had chemo number 2 on Monday. She has thrown up in the evening after chemo both times now, but after that she seems back to her normal spunky self. If she was down and sick for a while afterwards, I would stop putting her through chemo.
Gosh, my life seems so boring. Sometimes boring is good. Happy Valentine's Day everyone! May your day be filled with love and laughter. And chocolate! Lots of chocolate.
Thursday, December 25, 2014
Merry Christmas 2014!
Merry Christmas! I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season, enjoying it with family and friends and loved ones.
I can't believe I haven't posted on here in exactly a month. I have been busy with the holidays and in that holiday craziness daze.....having fun all month long with friends and family and the kids. I had a lunch holiday party at my house with 20 friends. We played LCR and did a gift exchange too. It was so fun, lots of laughs. Then the next day I let my kids have a holiday party at my house with their friends. Notice I had the grown-up party first, then the kids' party the next day! Otherwise my house would have been a mess for my friends! Then parties for Dave's work and other get-togethers with girlfriends has made for a fun, festive month.
I took the kids to the mall to see Santa and get the annual Santa pic. Cambria freaked out and screamed like crazy when she saw Santa. They took a quick picture, she is crying in it, Santa barely had time to ask the boys what they want for Christmas! I gave up after one try, I did not want to torture her. I did not see her warming up to Santa any time soon! Maybe next year.
We had a nice day today celebrating Christmas. Dave has to work 2-11 PM today, which is a bummer. But I'm thankful he has a job. We celebrated Christmas with my family on Sunday. Dave's dad is here at my house now, his first Christmas as a widower. So sad. It's just not the same without my MIL here too. Yesterday afternoon after Dave got home from work and on the way to church, D and I looked at each other and said "What are we going to have for dinner tomorrow on Christmas?!" LOL! We hadn't even thought about it! So afterwards we ran to the grocery store and managed to whip up some turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, corn, pecan pie, etc. for today. I high-fived him and told him I was proud of us and I felt like we were 23 & 24 years old again trying to figure out the whole holiday cooking thing like when we were younger! I am used to my parents making the holiday meals. ;) Although, this year, while he was cooking the food, I was running around chasing 4 kids and trying to clean up some of the wrapping paper & toys mess and doing laundry and getting Zack packed up for a baseball camp he's going to over the winter break!
Ahhhh, the life of parents with 4 kids and a husband who works insane hours, even over the holidays. Again, I'm grateful he has a good job, but I just wish he was home more. I miss him when he's gone.
My 44th birthday is on Sunday. I am less than thrilled. 44 seems so old. But at least I am healthy.
The sick family member I mentioned in previous posts is in the midst of 33 radiation treatments and 7 chemo treatments. One more month to go. They can do it, they can do it. I have faith. And hope. Because without faith and hope, what else have you got?
Best wishes to everyone in 2015. I hope everyone has good health. I know I whine a lot on this blog (mostly about the way I am treated by certain "family members", but I am thankful for the good things I do have in my life. xoxo
I can't believe I haven't posted on here in exactly a month. I have been busy with the holidays and in that holiday craziness daze.....having fun all month long with friends and family and the kids. I had a lunch holiday party at my house with 20 friends. We played LCR and did a gift exchange too. It was so fun, lots of laughs. Then the next day I let my kids have a holiday party at my house with their friends. Notice I had the grown-up party first, then the kids' party the next day! Otherwise my house would have been a mess for my friends! Then parties for Dave's work and other get-togethers with girlfriends has made for a fun, festive month.
I took the kids to the mall to see Santa and get the annual Santa pic. Cambria freaked out and screamed like crazy when she saw Santa. They took a quick picture, she is crying in it, Santa barely had time to ask the boys what they want for Christmas! I gave up after one try, I did not want to torture her. I did not see her warming up to Santa any time soon! Maybe next year.
We had a nice day today celebrating Christmas. Dave has to work 2-11 PM today, which is a bummer. But I'm thankful he has a job. We celebrated Christmas with my family on Sunday. Dave's dad is here at my house now, his first Christmas as a widower. So sad. It's just not the same without my MIL here too. Yesterday afternoon after Dave got home from work and on the way to church, D and I looked at each other and said "What are we going to have for dinner tomorrow on Christmas?!" LOL! We hadn't even thought about it! So afterwards we ran to the grocery store and managed to whip up some turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, corn, pecan pie, etc. for today. I high-fived him and told him I was proud of us and I felt like we were 23 & 24 years old again trying to figure out the whole holiday cooking thing like when we were younger! I am used to my parents making the holiday meals. ;) Although, this year, while he was cooking the food, I was running around chasing 4 kids and trying to clean up some of the wrapping paper & toys mess and doing laundry and getting Zack packed up for a baseball camp he's going to over the winter break!
Ahhhh, the life of parents with 4 kids and a husband who works insane hours, even over the holidays. Again, I'm grateful he has a good job, but I just wish he was home more. I miss him when he's gone.
My 44th birthday is on Sunday. I am less than thrilled. 44 seems so old. But at least I am healthy.
The sick family member I mentioned in previous posts is in the midst of 33 radiation treatments and 7 chemo treatments. One more month to go. They can do it, they can do it. I have faith. And hope. Because without faith and hope, what else have you got?
Best wishes to everyone in 2015. I hope everyone has good health. I know I whine a lot on this blog (mostly about the way I am treated by certain "family members", but I am thankful for the good things I do have in my life. xoxo
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
A Major Milestone
Cambria went pee pee on the potty 2 days ago- she was exactly 2 years and 2 months old! She also went again yesterday! And she ran to sit on the potty when we got home from going out to dinner after Zack's basketball game tonight! This is incredible! She is totally initiating this whole potty training thing. Everyone told me potty training girls was much easier than boys....my boys wouldn't even stand near the toilet until they were 3! Lol! We are not pushing the potty training issue on her at all, she wants to do it!
Zack got his report card for grading period 2 the other day, and he got straight A's again. Whew!
I can check Jacob's grades online and he has straight A's.
Joshua is in 1st grade, and they don't do A's B's C's yet, they only do E's and S's and N's and I's on their report cards. He is in the top reading group. He is a math whiz and can do a lot of math problems in his head.
Zack kicked butt at his last fall travel baseball game of the season a few weeks ago, and got a game ball! So proud of him.
Life seems perfect right now, doesn't it?! Ha ha things are never perfect in anyone's life, I am just choosing to focus on the positives now. There is that lingering issue of the sick family member with stage 4 cancer that wishes to remain anonymous. Very hard to deal with that when you are forbidden to tell anyone about it. I mean, I can talk to D about it, but he just lost his mother last month. God, I can't believe my MIL has been gone for a month already. My FIL is coming out to visit pretty soon for a few months. The kids love playing with him.
I have finally started working out again. After months of being persuaded to go to this new class, I finally have gone the last 3 weeks in a row! It's a 90 minute class...half cross fit and half spinning class. Good Lord, 90 minutes and I'm still alive to tell about it! Ha ha! It helps that 2 of my friends teach the class.
November is national adoption month. As always, I am thinking about Cambria's birth mom and also her entire birth family. I'm sure they all feel the loss of one of their "own" not growing up with them. I'm happy we have an open adoption and they can watch her grow up across the miles. We keep talking about trying to get back to NC to visit her birth family, but I just don't know when we will have the time. We are going to Hawaii for 2 weeks this summer....part of the time in Maui with 2 families we are friends with and their kids, then we are trying out the new Dis.ney Aul.ani resort on Oa.hu! It looks amazing! D doesn't get any more time off this summer. I told him he needed to take off Zack's bday in June, but he thinks he can only get the early shift that day. Bummer.
The vacation might be a little over the top, but one thing we have learned is that life is short. Order the dessert. Enjoy life. This time last year, we had no idea D's mom had terminal cancer and would be gone soon and not around to enjoy Thanksgiving and Christmas this year with her husband, kids and grandchildren.
I am going to start addressing holiday cards this weekend....after the turkey dinner. And not a minute before!
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. Wishing you all wonderful time spent with your families and good health. It really is priceless.
Zack got his report card for grading period 2 the other day, and he got straight A's again. Whew!
I can check Jacob's grades online and he has straight A's.
Joshua is in 1st grade, and they don't do A's B's C's yet, they only do E's and S's and N's and I's on their report cards. He is in the top reading group. He is a math whiz and can do a lot of math problems in his head.
Zack kicked butt at his last fall travel baseball game of the season a few weeks ago, and got a game ball! So proud of him.
Life seems perfect right now, doesn't it?! Ha ha things are never perfect in anyone's life, I am just choosing to focus on the positives now. There is that lingering issue of the sick family member with stage 4 cancer that wishes to remain anonymous. Very hard to deal with that when you are forbidden to tell anyone about it. I mean, I can talk to D about it, but he just lost his mother last month. God, I can't believe my MIL has been gone for a month already. My FIL is coming out to visit pretty soon for a few months. The kids love playing with him.
I have finally started working out again. After months of being persuaded to go to this new class, I finally have gone the last 3 weeks in a row! It's a 90 minute class...half cross fit and half spinning class. Good Lord, 90 minutes and I'm still alive to tell about it! Ha ha! It helps that 2 of my friends teach the class.
November is national adoption month. As always, I am thinking about Cambria's birth mom and also her entire birth family. I'm sure they all feel the loss of one of their "own" not growing up with them. I'm happy we have an open adoption and they can watch her grow up across the miles. We keep talking about trying to get back to NC to visit her birth family, but I just don't know when we will have the time. We are going to Hawaii for 2 weeks this summer....part of the time in Maui with 2 families we are friends with and their kids, then we are trying out the new Dis.ney Aul.ani resort on Oa.hu! It looks amazing! D doesn't get any more time off this summer. I told him he needed to take off Zack's bday in June, but he thinks he can only get the early shift that day. Bummer.
The vacation might be a little over the top, but one thing we have learned is that life is short. Order the dessert. Enjoy life. This time last year, we had no idea D's mom had terminal cancer and would be gone soon and not around to enjoy Thanksgiving and Christmas this year with her husband, kids and grandchildren.
I am going to start addressing holiday cards this weekend....after the turkey dinner. And not a minute before!
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. Wishing you all wonderful time spent with your families and good health. It really is priceless.
Friday, October 31, 2014
Happy Halloween!
Happy Halloween! We had a fun night trick-or-treating with the kids and their friends and our friends. Then we went out for a family dinner.
This month has been a horrible month, truth be told. Other than our 16th anniversary, this month has sucked ass. To put it frankly.
Dave's SIL died from cancer.
My MIL died exactly a week later from cancer.
They both passed away over the noon hour.
D and I went back east for the funeral and had an unpleasant encounter with D's brother, niece and her boyfriend.
They were horribly rude. All 3 of them.
And after the restaurant after the cemetery service, about 40 family members went to dinner at a restaurant and we were in the banquet room. My phone was stolen off the table and was found destroyed, soaking wet with the Otter Box cover taken off of it and at the bottom of the trash can in the men's restroom at the restaurant. The surveillance cameras don't extend into the banquet room so we don't know for sure who did it. But based on their location in the room and their vendetta against me, I'm pretty sure it was one or two or three of 3 possible people. I was a victim of a crime after a family funeral, for God's sake. Theft and destruction of property. Nice. I never named names at the family dinner of who I suspected stole and damaged my phone.
So this next part is funny/interesting/sad.......D's niece went up to D and said that I implied she stole my phone and she had nothing to do with it! Funny thing is, I never implied that she had anything to do with it. Guilty conscience, much?! I'm sure she is NOT the one who threw it in the men's restroom trashcan. It had to be a man. Then D's brother told his sister that he saw my comment on FB that I posted on my SIL's post about my phone. And he said that I edited my comment. SO darn creepy, I tell ya. I never posted anything about the phone incident on my own FB acct. My SIL did, and I just commented on it and I did edit it. But here's the even creepier part..... Who is stalking my FB comments on someone else's FB page? Who is taking screen shots and sending them to my BIL? Who is the loser that has nothing better to do than stalk me about what comments I make and tattle?! And I never named names on FB about who I suspected stole and damaged my phone. Again, guilty conscience, much?! Hey, if the shoe fits....lace it up and wear it for God's sake. That's all I'm saying. I'm not accusing them of stealing and destroying my phone....along with the pictures from the cemetery on my phone. I'm just recounting how they both took the time and effort to say they had nothing to do with it. Even though we didn't directly approach them about it.
My dog had her surgery for the mass in her leg that ate away 2/3 of her femur bone and had a skin graft.
Another family member is sick with cancer now.
Thank God a new month is beginning tomorrow. I can't take any more bad news this month.
This month has been a horrible month, truth be told. Other than our 16th anniversary, this month has sucked ass. To put it frankly.
Dave's SIL died from cancer.
My MIL died exactly a week later from cancer.
They both passed away over the noon hour.
D and I went back east for the funeral and had an unpleasant encounter with D's brother, niece and her boyfriend.
They were horribly rude. All 3 of them.
And after the restaurant after the cemetery service, about 40 family members went to dinner at a restaurant and we were in the banquet room. My phone was stolen off the table and was found destroyed, soaking wet with the Otter Box cover taken off of it and at the bottom of the trash can in the men's restroom at the restaurant. The surveillance cameras don't extend into the banquet room so we don't know for sure who did it. But based on their location in the room and their vendetta against me, I'm pretty sure it was one or two or three of 3 possible people. I was a victim of a crime after a family funeral, for God's sake. Theft and destruction of property. Nice. I never named names at the family dinner of who I suspected stole and damaged my phone.
So this next part is funny/interesting/sad.......D's niece went up to D and said that I implied she stole my phone and she had nothing to do with it! Funny thing is, I never implied that she had anything to do with it. Guilty conscience, much?! I'm sure she is NOT the one who threw it in the men's restroom trashcan. It had to be a man. Then D's brother told his sister that he saw my comment on FB that I posted on my SIL's post about my phone. And he said that I edited my comment. SO darn creepy, I tell ya. I never posted anything about the phone incident on my own FB acct. My SIL did, and I just commented on it and I did edit it. But here's the even creepier part..... Who is stalking my FB comments on someone else's FB page? Who is taking screen shots and sending them to my BIL? Who is the loser that has nothing better to do than stalk me about what comments I make and tattle?! And I never named names on FB about who I suspected stole and damaged my phone. Again, guilty conscience, much?! Hey, if the shoe fits....lace it up and wear it for God's sake. That's all I'm saying. I'm not accusing them of stealing and destroying my phone....along with the pictures from the cemetery on my phone. I'm just recounting how they both took the time and effort to say they had nothing to do with it. Even though we didn't directly approach them about it.
My dog had her surgery for the mass in her leg that ate away 2/3 of her femur bone and had a skin graft.
Another family member is sick with cancer now.
Thank God a new month is beginning tomorrow. I can't take any more bad news this month.
Thursday, October 16, 2014
The End of A Story
I think I wrote my last post late Sunday night (after midnight). Dave's SIL passed away on Monday afternoon. Her daughter barely made it home in time from overseas on Sunday night to see her and say goodbye. Her mother was unresponsive and didn't get to say anything to her daughter.
Her funeral was today. We did not go. Her last words to me on this earth a month ago when she spewed venomous words at me for 40 minutes were, "You are a cancer in this family." (Interesting choice of words from a cancer patient, no?) And then she screamed "F-You" at me, and that is when I finally chose to end the phone call and not take her verbal nastiness anymore. My brother-in-law's last words to me during that phone call were, "You are not a member of this family anymore. Nobody likes you."
Last week I found out they told my in-laws they would never accept my daughter into the family after we brought her home.
Imagine that. A little 7 lb 3 oz baby.....they were so threatened by the mere thought of my daughter that they would never accept her into the family? Grow up people, for God's sake.
I'm sure that the reason they said this (and held true to their word of not accepting my daughter into the family and barely acknowledging her existence) was because she took away their daughter's position of being the only granddaughter on that side of the family. Jealousy rearing it's ugly head. Sigh....
And we found out they were talking sh*t about us behind our backs for the past 2 years at least. D talked to his brother and told him all the reasons we would not be at the funeral. That we're sure she told her family just her side of the story....she probably didn't tell them the whole story- about the things she said and did to me. So her family would probably cause a scene if we showed up to the funeral. His brother said he understood and wasn't mad. He didn't even try and say that stuff wasn't true.
So my thoughts on this event......
I am sorry she died. I am sorry she had to suffer through that awful disease. I am sorry her daughter is left without a mother at such a young age. I wish I knew why she hated me so much. D and I have gone over this so many times.....trying to think of any reason why she hated me so much. I have honestly never done anything to her in the almost 21 years that I knew her to warrant her thinking so poorly of me. It is sad. The whole situation is beyond sad. I never in a million years would have thought D and I and our kids wouldn't have attended her funeral. My real SIL didn't go either. And my in-laws didn't go....my MIL is way too sick to travel and my FIL didn't want to leave her alone. So none of the immediate family was at the funeral on our side.
I posted a quick thing on FB about her passing. People ask me all the time how she is doing, so I figured I'd write a post about it to inform everyone at once. It wasn't warm and fuzzy, just kind of matter-of-fact. People were so kind and posted such sweet and supportive messages. I kind of felt like a fraud. But how do I post on FB that in reality, my SIL was a really mean person to me and in the end she told me she'd never liked me? So I just thanked everyone for the kind words and kept it short and sweet.
We tried to patch things up with her in the summer. That backfired. My in-laws tried to get everyone together this spring. They refused. We said we would go and would be nice and polite.
Sometimes I get sick of being told to forgive and forget and be the bigger person. It really didn't get us anywhere with them.
BTW, she had the same brain tumor as the girl whose story has gone viral recently who moved to a state that has dying with dignity laws. The girl in the news does not want to experience the horrific suffering that comes with this brain tumor. D's SIL was unresponsive the last week of her life. It happened suddenly, so she didn't have time to say goodbye to everyone. She suffered a lot in the end. It was a horrible way to finish out her days on this earth. I still don't think I could ever do it. I don't have the guts to do it. But I also have 4 young kids who rely on me...a lot. I would fight my hardest to spend as much time as possible with them.
OK now that I've written the end of the story....her story.....on my blog, I am putting it to rest. I am not going to talk about her anymore. I can ask myself the same question of why she hated me a million times, and I will never have the answer. I wish things had ended differently. I wish we had made up and were on good terms when she passed. I really do. But wishes don't always come true.
Her funeral was today. We did not go. Her last words to me on this earth a month ago when she spewed venomous words at me for 40 minutes were, "You are a cancer in this family." (Interesting choice of words from a cancer patient, no?) And then she screamed "F-You" at me, and that is when I finally chose to end the phone call and not take her verbal nastiness anymore. My brother-in-law's last words to me during that phone call were, "You are not a member of this family anymore. Nobody likes you."
Last week I found out they told my in-laws they would never accept my daughter into the family after we brought her home.
Imagine that. A little 7 lb 3 oz baby.....they were so threatened by the mere thought of my daughter that they would never accept her into the family? Grow up people, for God's sake.
I'm sure that the reason they said this (and held true to their word of not accepting my daughter into the family and barely acknowledging her existence) was because she took away their daughter's position of being the only granddaughter on that side of the family. Jealousy rearing it's ugly head. Sigh....
And we found out they were talking sh*t about us behind our backs for the past 2 years at least. D talked to his brother and told him all the reasons we would not be at the funeral. That we're sure she told her family just her side of the story....she probably didn't tell them the whole story- about the things she said and did to me. So her family would probably cause a scene if we showed up to the funeral. His brother said he understood and wasn't mad. He didn't even try and say that stuff wasn't true.
So my thoughts on this event......
I am sorry she died. I am sorry she had to suffer through that awful disease. I am sorry her daughter is left without a mother at such a young age. I wish I knew why she hated me so much. D and I have gone over this so many times.....trying to think of any reason why she hated me so much. I have honestly never done anything to her in the almost 21 years that I knew her to warrant her thinking so poorly of me. It is sad. The whole situation is beyond sad. I never in a million years would have thought D and I and our kids wouldn't have attended her funeral. My real SIL didn't go either. And my in-laws didn't go....my MIL is way too sick to travel and my FIL didn't want to leave her alone. So none of the immediate family was at the funeral on our side.
I posted a quick thing on FB about her passing. People ask me all the time how she is doing, so I figured I'd write a post about it to inform everyone at once. It wasn't warm and fuzzy, just kind of matter-of-fact. People were so kind and posted such sweet and supportive messages. I kind of felt like a fraud. But how do I post on FB that in reality, my SIL was a really mean person to me and in the end she told me she'd never liked me? So I just thanked everyone for the kind words and kept it short and sweet.
We tried to patch things up with her in the summer. That backfired. My in-laws tried to get everyone together this spring. They refused. We said we would go and would be nice and polite.
Sometimes I get sick of being told to forgive and forget and be the bigger person. It really didn't get us anywhere with them.
BTW, she had the same brain tumor as the girl whose story has gone viral recently who moved to a state that has dying with dignity laws. The girl in the news does not want to experience the horrific suffering that comes with this brain tumor. D's SIL was unresponsive the last week of her life. It happened suddenly, so she didn't have time to say goodbye to everyone. She suffered a lot in the end. It was a horrible way to finish out her days on this earth. I still don't think I could ever do it. I don't have the guts to do it. But I also have 4 young kids who rely on me...a lot. I would fight my hardest to spend as much time as possible with them.
OK now that I've written the end of the story....her story.....on my blog, I am putting it to rest. I am not going to talk about her anymore. I can ask myself the same question of why she hated me a million times, and I will never have the answer. I wish things had ended differently. I wish we had made up and were on good terms when she passed. I really do. But wishes don't always come true.
Monday, October 13, 2014
October Update
So much going on here! And not all of it has been good. My 7th grader who is at a new school in town this year (Ba.sis) got his 1st quarter report card recently, and he got straight A's! He has 9 different classes, one of them being Mandarin! My 4th grader got straight A's too! Still waiting to see my 1st grader's report card. I'm so proud of those kids. They work hard.
My MIL has stage 4 ovarian cancer. We recently went back East to visit with her over the kids' fall break. She is pretty weak and thin and sits in her recliner all day. Barely eats or drinks anything. She just got a hospital bed the other day. I'm glad we got to see her. Friday is our 16 year anniversary. I have known her for almost 21 years. It is so sad that she won't be around for much longer. When we were saying goodbye, she hugged me and said, "Enjoy my grandchildren."
OH. MY. GOD. Tears and tears on my end after that comment. She won't get to see her grandchildren again.
Dave's SIL (the one who is so mean and nasty to me) who has the brain tumor.....I mentioned she called me up last month and chewed me a new one. Well this past week she went into hospice. Her tumor grew and she had complications and wasn't very responsive. We won't, however, get to say goodbye to her. Dave's brother didn't even call him with the update- D's father told us. Good Lord, I am so sick of family drama.
My sweet 2-year-old dog.....she has a mass on her femur that ate away 2/3 of her bone. She is having surgery soon to clean out the mass (it might be from valley fever) and do a bone graft from her shoulder bone I think. Hopefully this will work and she won't have to have her leg amputated.
My brother is getting married in February. I'm so excited to have a new SIL. I'm also excited for them to have kids so my kids can have some cousins!
I got to see my childhood besties when we were back East, so that was nice. D got to see his childhood friends too.
Other than that, our lives are filled with baseball, soccer, tennis, homework, friends, playdates, mommy & me dance and also music class with Cambria, and time with the kids.
I haven't mentioned anything in this post about our open adoption....not too, too much to report. Things are going well. I had a photo book made for Cambria's 2nd birthday and I am going to mail it this week to her birth mom. I also want to get pictures printed to mail to her two birth grandmas.
I can't wait to celebrate 16 years with the hubster on Friday!
My MIL has stage 4 ovarian cancer. We recently went back East to visit with her over the kids' fall break. She is pretty weak and thin and sits in her recliner all day. Barely eats or drinks anything. She just got a hospital bed the other day. I'm glad we got to see her. Friday is our 16 year anniversary. I have known her for almost 21 years. It is so sad that she won't be around for much longer. When we were saying goodbye, she hugged me and said, "Enjoy my grandchildren."
OH. MY. GOD. Tears and tears on my end after that comment. She won't get to see her grandchildren again.
Dave's SIL (the one who is so mean and nasty to me) who has the brain tumor.....I mentioned she called me up last month and chewed me a new one. Well this past week she went into hospice. Her tumor grew and she had complications and wasn't very responsive. We won't, however, get to say goodbye to her. Dave's brother didn't even call him with the update- D's father told us. Good Lord, I am so sick of family drama.
My sweet 2-year-old dog.....she has a mass on her femur that ate away 2/3 of her bone. She is having surgery soon to clean out the mass (it might be from valley fever) and do a bone graft from her shoulder bone I think. Hopefully this will work and she won't have to have her leg amputated.
My brother is getting married in February. I'm so excited to have a new SIL. I'm also excited for them to have kids so my kids can have some cousins!
I got to see my childhood besties when we were back East, so that was nice. D got to see his childhood friends too.
Other than that, our lives are filled with baseball, soccer, tennis, homework, friends, playdates, mommy & me dance and also music class with Cambria, and time with the kids.
I haven't mentioned anything in this post about our open adoption....not too, too much to report. Things are going well. I had a photo book made for Cambria's 2nd birthday and I am going to mail it this week to her birth mom. I also want to get pictures printed to mail to her two birth grandmas.
I can't wait to celebrate 16 years with the hubster on Friday!
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