1 year ago today, we took our daughter home from the hospital! We didn't take her home to AZ, but we took her "home" to the hotel in NC, where we would stay until Oct. 3rd when ICPC was cleared and we were able to travel across state lines with her.
What a day that was! Suddenly I have a new baby. A daughter. Oh my word, it was exhilarating and so special. I fell instantly in love with her.
That morning before hospital discharge, the hospital photographer came in the room and took her newborn pictures. They turned out amazing. The nurse wheeled her birth mom (along with her birth father) down to the hospital lobby and their car, and then came back up for us. I rode down to the lobby in a wheelchair, and Cambria was in my lap. I have this picture of the 3 of us- Dave was standing behind us in the wheelchair. It feels like just yesterday. I was beaming.
But that day was bittersweet. We were so happy, but the thing that brought us such joy brought her birth mother such heartache.
Again, I'm teary eyed thinking of this day.
Her birth parents took some time to say good bye to their precious daughter alone in the hospital room, then they put her in her carseat and we came in the room and they left. What an image. What a memory. The 4 of us crying in the hospital, hugging and saying goodbye. I can't imagine what that was like for her birth mother to give her daughter to us- strangers at the time. I mean, I saw what it was like for her on the outside- crying and sadness. But I wonder what it was like for her on the inside? I'm sure she felt like she was dying on the inside. Losing a piece of herself. But she was strong and wise beyond her years, and knew that she couldn't give her daughter the life she wanted for her. And so she entrusted us with her sweet daughter. What an honor for us.
We spent the week hanging out as a family of 3 (my sons were back in AZ with my parents). Dave and I have reflected back on that time often and with fondness. It was easy and carefree (as much as it could be with a newborn! HA!).....well, except for worrying about her birth mother changing her mind and taking the baby back. Her state has a 7 day revocation period. We took a lot of walks with the baby in the stroller, went out to eat and to the mall and, oh yeah made a few trips to the pediatrician's office there! She had jaundice, and we kept having to get her bilirubin levels checked. And we just hung out in the hotel room and snuggled with our new daughter. Did I say daughter? I finally had a daughter!
How was it so possible for me to fall in love so quickly with this baby that I did not carry in my womb for 9 months? It wasn't just possible, it was easy!!
God has blessed us in so many ways. I feel like this baby and I were meant to find each other.
What an incredible journey.
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