About a year before Cami arrived, I went to see the fertility (infertility?) specialist about doing IVF. I had seen him 6 months before too. Then we were matched with that birthmom in San Francisco. So when that match fell apart in April, I took some time to collect my thoughts and in the summer decided to see the IVF doctor again. I was told my hormone levels took a dump, and to optimize chances of getting pregnant, they recommended I use an egg donor. I was ok with that. After all, I was planning on adopting. I started looking through the egg donor profiles. I picked this young woman who had striking eyes. She was in the middle of another cycle with another family, so we would have to wait until she was done with that to begin our cycle with her.
Then DH (dear hubby) announced that he preferred to adopt instead of using an egg donor. He said it would put us on an even playing field if neither one of us was related to the baby biologically. Whereas, with an egg donor, it would be his biological baby but not mine and an uneven playing field of sorts. Okayyyy...... I guess I couldn't really argue with him, especially since he was the one working his ass off and paying for this adoption/ IVF costs.
How weird is it that I had to have a hysterectomy 8 months after we adopted a baby? And not before? I am glad of the timing. Is that weird? That we chose to adopt not because it was our only choice, but because we thought it was the better choice at the time? Instead of IVF, with a baby that would be half our ours biologically after we already had 3 bio kids? At that time, I thought that I could still get pregnant and carry a child. And we still opted to go the adoption route. (I'm so happy we did!)
After my surgery one week ago today, I think the chances of me getting pregnant were extremely slim. I'm so glad we didn't fork over the $$$ and put my body thru the meds and IVF procedures.
Now I have to decide if I want to take Lupron. It is a shot that lasts for 3 months to shut down endometriosis. My doctor suggested it in the hospital to shut down any remaining endometriosis. Good God, how bad was it in there?! She said we could do the shot at my follow-up appt next week. I was like "oh sure, no problem". Well, then I started reading about the side effects of Lupron. Holy cow! One of the entries when I Googled it said "Are you in Lupron hell?"
There can be bad side effects. Really bad.
We are supposed to leave for Maui in July. I am afraid to get this shot that lasts in your body for 3 months when I have to get on an airplane in a month. But if I don't take the Lupron, if the endometriosis is really bad, it can eat away at my intestines, bladder, etc.
I am really torn.
I think if I do the Lupron shot, I'll do it after we get home from Maui.
And for now, I'm going to go love on that sweet baby girl of mine that came to me exactly the way God intended her to! :)
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